Jacqueline Soares, Non Denominational Officiant
Beach Weddings
Memorial Officiant
Mobile Notary Services
Jacqueline Soares, Non Denominational Officiant
Beach Weddings
Memorial Officiant
Mobile Notary Services
I DoToday.com
I Do Today & Forever More
Wedding Officiant for Orange County and Greater Los Angeles area
My Blog
Posted on 6 September, 2015 at 14:53 |
The save the dates are in and the invitations on their way.
In just a few short weeks, wedding season will be in full swing, along
with the stress of the average $31,213 price tag for the happy couple and
$592 average cost for guests. That’s according to the annual wedding report
from The Knot and a recent survey by American Express.
With weddings and pre-wedding events already crowding the
planner pages of every other spring and summer weekend, it’s time to think
budget. Every year, the same financial concerns come up, and despite the
whispered misgivings of the budget-conscious and financially-strapped, the
unreasonable wedding culture continues. Even the most grounded and low-key
brides-to-be eventually fall prey to the hysteria of wedding mania, as the most
frugal guests get caught up in unreasonable expectations and fears of violating
misguided laws of etiquette.
Social, cultural and familial precedents, along with high
emotions and unrealistic expectations set by media and pop culture, fuel the continuous
escalation of a simple celebration into a high-cost, high-stress event. What the wedding industry seems to be suffering from is a gross
lack of perspective. Practices that are completely and entirely optional have
become thought of as must-have staples, driving many couples either further
into debt or farther from major financial goals such as buying a home or
starting a family.
While every bride and groom will have his or her own
priorities when it comes to planning the big day, it helps to start with the
bare bones of what’s required – a marriage license and officiant. Remembering
that everything else is optional might help infuse a long overdue dose of
reason into the wedding industry.
Here are some prime examples of optional wedding rituals
turned overblown staples that you might be better off without. The engagement ring: After
the reception, the engagement ring is the second biggest wedding expense,
coming in at an average of $5,598 in 2013. What couples seem to have forgotten
is that it’s the commitment to marry that makes them engaged, not the money
spent on a piece of jewelry that will become redundant once wedding bands are
exchanged.
The standard three months’ salary spent on a ring could be
used to fund so many alternate, shared endeavors, such as furnishing a home or kick
starting future college saving. Buying into an artificially controlled diamond
supply will not make your love or relationship any more valuable, but it
certainly can result in a significant hit to your
net worth. The pricey wedding dress.
You don’t have to skip the dress entirely, but you can certainly pass on
the several thousand-dollar price tag. Wedding dresses are for one day only. Affordable
alternatives can be found online, through resale sites and dress rental
companies. You might even be able to borrow a dress from a family member or close
friend.
Paper: It’s the
thick of the digital age and despite a slight decline in average spending on
invites, the 2014 mean price tag still sat at $439. Given the ubiquity of
digital correspondence, including five different pieces of paper in one
invitation that already references an online website for more information seems
awful wasteful, both financially and environmentally.
Pre-wedding events: What
started as a singular precursor to the big day has evolved into an engagement
party, lingerie party, spa day, bachelorette party and goodness knows what else,
each with its own set of commitments and fiscal expectations. The tab for these
cumulative events tacked onto wedding day costs can easily soar into the
hundreds if not thousands
of dollars. Add to that a destination event, an increasingly common choice
among couples, and you can pretty much count on kissing at least one of your
personal financial goals goodbye.
Gifts: With so
much spending required for guests to simply attend nuptial celebrations, a
return to “presence as the present” might be in order. The $592 average cost of
attendance doesn’t even include gifts that often follow the misguided “cover
the cost of your plate” myth – easily tacking on an extra hundred bucks or two.
As the etiquette experts say, an invitation is not an invoice.Give in line with your budget and in a
way that makes for you and your relationship with the happy couple. A wedding is a celebration, and stressing over overblown
costs is a total buzz kill. It’s time to strip away the many so-called staples
and redefine
weddings, building from the ground up, prioritizing what’s most important.
While expectations and emotions run high, you can stay grounded in your fiscal
reality by connecting with what’s ultimately the most important part of your
big day – your new relationship. Stefanie O'Connell is a New York City based actress and
freelance writer. She chronicles her struggle to “live the dream” on a
starving artists’ budget at thebrokeandbeautifullife.com and her book, “The Broke and Beautiful Life,” is now available. |
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